High Holidays in Haifa

Ah the holidays.

Last week, I experienced my first Yom Kippur in Israel. In other words, for the first time in my 34 years I witnessed utter quietude in an otherwise bustling city. Yom Kippur, the day of atonement, for my gentile readers, is a day of fasting and reflection for the religious, and a day off from work and school for the secular. Kids on bikes rule the city. And for 24 hours no one is on the roads, everyone is with family, and the city is so quiet, you can hear traffic signals switch from red to green.

My family falls into the secular category. I decided to visit my aunt and uncle in Haifa. For me, Haifa is synonymous with family time. As a child, I spent summer after summer playing with cousins while staying at my grandparents apartment. We gorged on grandmas cooking after going to the beach, and as I got older, to pubs and clubs in Haifa. But since my grandparents passed away, the city has lost its draw and there's an empty sadness I feel when I'm there. How fitting for atoning.

After I arrived from a day spent outside Jerusalem, I quickly threw on a skirt, and spent one hour at an uninspired service. We came home, ate dinner, and then the fasting began. I mostly slept. This year, no great hunger-induced revelation occurred. I did however, witness Haifa devoid of noise, which was pretty amazing. 22 hours later, my aunt insisted I eat something small. I always feel a sense of failure aquiessing so close to the end. But avocado toast never tasted so good. I threw my skirt back on and we heard the shofar blow, which was a pretty triumphant way to announce the end of looking back, and the start of looking forward. With that, I grabbed the first bus back to Tel Aviv.

Crayfish, Aquavit, Helan går

In September, what's not to love about Sweden? It's friendly, the weather is perfect and the country is manicured, and probably years ahead of its time. Oh and the people are very helpful...but I will get to that later.

As you may recall, I was invited here by folks I met whilst surfing in Portugal. Though a crayfish/end of summer party was the official reason, it was just an excuse to come to a place I've always wanted to visit and to see people I'd had so much fun with. So on Wednesday, I met two surf friends in the central station and off went went to Alvik- an area on the outskirts of town. After a dinner of Swedish meatballs with lingonberries (oh yes I did) and herring and other perfectly delicious fishy things, we called it a night. The next morning began with a visit to the Vasa museum. The Vasa is a 17th century warship (the Black Pearl from the Pirates of the Caribbean is modeled after it). The Vasa was to be the pride of king Gustavs fleet- it had everything one would expect from a top of the line warship...except apparently the ability to sail. The ship went down twenty minutes into its maiden voyage. And this is what kills me about the Swedes-this should be a source of embarrassment, and maybe it was-300 years ago, but when they raised the ship in the 60s and created a museum around it, people said- aren't we lucky we get to experience something so ancient and beautiful up close?

With no plan after the Vasa, my partner in crime, a Portuguese guy who decided his Viking name would be Knut, and I decided to wander the island we were on- I decided my Viking name was Freyja (goddess of love and war).

Oh, this would be a good time to mention the fact that Stockholm is made up of tons of islands. On a 30 minute walk you can literally cross four bridges. So if you see something in the distance, there's no way to know what island it's on.

Anyway, in the distance we saw something that looked like a roller coaster- Gröna Lund is a theme part right in the middle of town and was just the thing to do on a sunny Thursday afternoon. So like two small children we shrieked with glee and every twist, turn, and drop of the 7-plus roller coasters and other rides the park had to offer. And since it was mid week in September there were few kids in sight, within 1.5 hours we had ridden every ride in sight. Drinks and dinner followed, making our first full day in Stockholm totally random, and ridiculously fun.

Here's a view of the amusement park.

The next days were filled with sight seeing and laughs. We managed to see a bunch of tourist attractions, but on our own, very relaxed terms- we probably learned more about the town than most locals.

Finally on Saturday we made our Crayfish 

Party happen. Ironically there were only three swedes in attendance. The rest of the group was made up of two French folks, a German, two Americans, a Brit, a Ugandan, and 5 or so Portugese folks. But we did it right- we sang songs about frogs and drinking the whole shot (Helan går is the song) and ate our faces off. Here's a before and after:

After eating and drinking too much, we decided to rest up a while in Alvik- which meant that we just sat around indoors drinking instead of in the park. I was exhausted, so naturally one of the Swedish guys decided that I had to wake up...by doing acroyoga.

Yeah. In a sleepy haze I did acroyoga, which basically consists of two people doing weird acrobatics:

So after being twisted and turned in multiple directions, I must admit, I wasn't sleepy anymore. Off we went to a series of bars.

The next day, we decided to take a boat and go to the archipelago-which should have been pretty and  uneventful... however in a moment of ill conceived timing and poor communication, I went to the bathroom while the rest of my group exited our boat. They only realized I wasn't there after the boat had left the dock. In the meantime, I wasn't worried, as I thought my friends had pulled a prank...until I got an apology text. So I went up to the front of the boat and spoke with one of its employees- he radioed in what had happened, dropped me off on a random island, where another boat picked me up. I waited less than one minute on shore. While entering the new boat, I asked if they were heading to Vaxholm- the island I was supposed to go to- they said yes and that they had come just for me. Embarrassed laughs went all around and I was finally dropped ashore at Vaxholm- I was met with giggles and a slightly embarrassed group. We wandered around then headed back. We said goodbye to most of the group and headed off. I spent the last two days sight seeing on my own and since I'm a bad Jew and it is Rosh Hashana, I even went to to Stockholm synagogue  for services- all I did was send an email, they sent tickets. For the shortest service I've ever attended, I had do to the usual airport style security- passport check, basic questions about Judaism, etc. I was told by my Swedish friend that nothing bad had ever happened, but the fact that guards with guns are necessary still didn't put me at ease. But I'm glad I experienced Jewish prayers in Swedish- it's lovely and utterly weird.

Here are a few things I've learned:

1. There's a song for every occasion...and also Aquavit

2. Everyone speaks English. Everyone. I'm even having breakfast in a place where every employee is Australian and no one is attempting to speak Swedish 

3. If you read words aloud, Swedish is kind of easy to understand

4. There is no such thing as bad weather, just bad clothing- or so the saying goes- though I have yet to meet anyone who is looking forward to winter

5. All goods and services are taxed 25% so everyone can have a living wage- so a pizza might cost $20, but you get paid to go to college...so there's that

6. The Swedes hate the Danes...but not really

7. The term going berserk comes from a Viking word- and it basically meant getting drunk, eating shrooms and going ape shit on your enemies

8. There are 10 million fewer people in Sweden than in New York State (9.6 million)- but there's always an IKEA near you and you're probably using spotify- that's serious influence 

9. You cannot buy refrigerated beer anywhere

10. Need a vaccine? There's a clinic for that. I went and now I'm ready for my next trip...

The Thing About Tel Aviv

So I know I haven't posted in a while. I know. I've been in Tel Aviv for a little over three weeks and I've been trying to distill just what it is about this place I like so much.

I like that after a day at work, people head to the beach for a beer and a swim. I like that I've met incredibly kind and fun people who keep taking me to amazing bars, restaurants, clubs, and festivals. I like how the air smells salty along the shore, eucalyptus further inland, and is peppered with jasmine at night.

Among other things-

Everyone rides a bike. Everyone smokes hash. Cafe culture is alive and well, though Israelis are terrible drinkers. I have yet to have a bad meal, cocktail, or fruit smoothie.

I like that people here are perfectly content to live within a bubble. They know what's going on and they struggle with tensions in the region and yet, it's all back burnered because quality of life is more important and because they can just smoke on the beach.

You have to stand your ground here- fight to be next in line, get the good seat, the taxi, order your drink, but it's all part of the chaotic beauty of the place.

I'm heading to Stockholm today- and maybe that will give me more perspective, but all I know is that every minute in Tel Aviv has made me feel like even if I'd have to get used to fighting for my place in line, my cab, my drink, it would be ok- cause at the end of the day I can head to the beach.